Subject: Self-Introduction
Dear Professor Brad Blackstone
My name is Mohamed Amsyar, a student from your critical thinking and communication class. The purpose of this letter is to formally introduce myself to you in hopes that you get to know me better. In 2020, I graduated from Republic Polytechnic with a diploma in engineering design with business. Currently, I am studying mechanical engineering at the Singapore Institute of Technology.
My interest in mechanical engineering developed during polytechnic. I always had a strong interest in modules that allowed me to learn and create products that would benefit humans and the environment. I am intrigued by the latest technology and will read articles or watch videos about it, such as the latest electric vehicle or buildings with unique design infrastructure. I believe that in 10 years, new technologies will emerge and I would like to be a part of that development. Therefore, I have decided to further my education and pursue a degree in mechanical engineering as it best fits my interests and career goals.
I feel that my strength in communication is being a good listener. During my time in national service, I was a sergeant at the Basic Military Training Centre. I had to communicate with many recruits and superiors daily to ensure that everything ran in an orderly manner. I often echo the words of the speaker talking in my head to understand their message while putting aside distractions or mentally preparing myself for what to say in return. I believe that communication can never happen without listening. Through listening, I can break down information and not jump to conclusions. However, I struggle with word articulation when I present. People might get confused due to my poor sentence structure. I tend to skip sentences that would build on the delivery of the message and get straight to the point till the intended message gets lost. I then have to repeat and rephrase what I am trying to convey.
Throughout the 13 weeks of critical thinking and communication, I hope to develop better articulation and report writing skills. Being better at articulating my words will equip me with the confidence to present and enable me to express my message more distinctly. For report writing, I hope to be able to write professionally and make my points clear and concise without giving unnecessary details.
Lastly, I believe everyone is unique. My discipline and resilience are what make me unique. I am willing to face new challenges and strive to work towards the standards I set for myself.
It is a well-written letter of self introduction with flawless grammatic and sentencing structure error. Good job
ReplyDeleteHello CongWei,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to read my letter of introduction and providing concise feedback on it. See you in class.
Best regards,
Mohamed Amsyar
Hello, I'm aleeya. Overall your letter does not have any grammatical errors. You followed the guideline and structure closely, hence it was a complete letter! Keep up writing flawlessly :)
ReplyDeleteHello Aleeya,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to read my letter and providing feedback.
Best regards,
Mohamed Amsyar
Hello Amsyar!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the well-written introductory letter. Reading through your letter has given me better insights into your personality, strength, and weakness in communication skills. I believe you are an amazing Sergeant for new recruits at BMTC. The content structure of the letter is constructed nicely with each point illustrating something above the previous content. Additionally, I do not spot any grammatical errors while reading through the letter. Do keep this up for the remaining assignments of the module!
Thank you and see you in class.
Regards,
Jing Dao
Hello Jing Dao,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to read my letter and proving me with constructive feedback. After 3 weeks of attending critical thinking and communication class, I can tell that you have a strong potential in terms of speaking/presenting and also writing. Keep up the great work and I am sure that you will be able to achieve your goals for this module. See you around in class!
Best regards,
Mohamed Amsyar
Hi there Amsyar. An overall solid introduction letter. I believe after having read it, I am much more able to understand the kind of person you are. I believe your recruits back then appreciates having you as their sergeant. I'm keen on seeing your progress in this module. No errors spotted in your essay grammar wise
ReplyDeleteHello Danish,
DeleteThank you for the positive feedback on my letter. I believe that throughout the 13 weeks of this module, we are able to work on our weakness and achieve our goals for this module.
See you in class!
Best regards,
Mohamed Amsyar
Dear Amsyar,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this detailed letter and the personal sharing. I appreciate the rich content that is well aligned with the assignment brief, the clear organization and the generally flawless language use. You've done a very fine job providing supporting information for each specific content area, allowing us readers to gain a better understanding of who you are. It's easy to see that you have great leadership potential.
There is one minor language issue to take note of:
-- I had to communicate with many recruits and superiors daily to ensure that everything runs in an orderly manner. > (verb tense consistency) I had to communicate with many recruits and superiors daily to ensure that everything RAN in an orderly manner.
I look forward to reading more of your writing this term.
Cheers,
Brad
Dear Professor Brad Blackstone,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to read and provide feedback on my letter. I will make the necessary changes.
Best regards,
Mohamed Amsyar